Do you have a Little Ninja or an aspiring Karate master at home? Would you like to brighten their day in a way that is tailored just for them? Then what you are looking for are jokes, but not just any kind of jokes. You are looking for Karate jokes they will find funny.
Karate jokes for kids are age appropriate, simple jokes with alliteration, rhyming, or ridiculous surprises. Some are directly about Karate and others involve instructors or students. All of this gets mixed together for some good, clean fun.
Keep reading below to find some tools to tickle the funny bone of any child that has an interest in Karate. They are broken up into categories so you can jump right to the ones your Little Ninja will get the biggest ‘Kick‘ out of (pun intended).
Karate Jokes About Animals
Here you will find jokes that mix Karate and animals together for a ‘Howling‘ good time. Many kids take on a fascination of animals at some point in their growing years. They pick their favorite ones and learn about many even outside of structured learning times.
Some of these jokes are directly related to Karate and some have been adapted to a Karate theme. Use this as a jumping off point and you will be coming up with your own Karate animal jokes in no time.
What do you call it when a Karate chicken beats up a fox that tried to eat him?A chicken licken
What do you call a pigs favorite karate move?Pork-chop
What did the evil spider say to the fly that knew Karate?Good-bye Karate fly!
What did the Karate fly say just before he kicked the evil spider in the mouth?Open wider evil spider!
How did the Karate kangaroo get away from the crocodile?Chop and Hop, Chop and Hop
What do you call a bird that knows Karate?Kung Fu Cockatoo
What flies really fast and attacks your knee?A Karate Bee
What climbs up your back to deliver its kick?A Karate Tick
What did the Black Belt horse say to the White Belt fly?Shoo fly don’t bother me
What did the Black Belt lizard say to the White Belt fly?Gulp… yum
What is the greatest fear of every Ninja Mouse?A Karate Cat
What did the Cat say when she hurt her paw trying to break a brick at her Karate test?Me-ooooooow
What does a Karate Cow scream just before practicing a flying side kick?Moooooo-ve outta the way!
What did the Karate Snake say to his instructor when he missed the kicking target and hit his hand?Sssssssss-orry
What did the Karate Dog say when he forgot to block his stomach in Karate class?W-ooooof
What did the sheep say when she accidentally broke a lamp while practicing Karate at home?My ba-aaa-aa-aad
What did the Karate Bee say when the flower complained about him stealing her nectar?Keep your guard up Butter-cup.
What did the Karate Moth say to the dragonfly when he escaped?Nice try dragonfly
Who is an expert at using their teeth to break Karate boards?A Black Belt Beaver
What animals use banana peels on their mats to practice on slippery surfaces?Messy Master Monkeys
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Why was the frog jumping all around holding his foot during Karate class?He said, “You kicked my Toad!”
What do you call a goat’s child who takes Karate?Karate Kid
What Karate moves do sheep teach their kids to do to break boards?Lamb-chops
What did they change his name to after Bruce Lee tried to fight a bear?Bruised Lee
A man saw a monkey for sale. The store owner said the monkey knew Karate. The man didn’t believe him.
The store owner held a board and said, “Karate this board.” The monkey went KICK… PUNCH… CHOP! The board fell in pieces.
The man bought the monkey and took him home. He held up a board and said, “Karate this board.” KICK… PUNCH… CHOP! The board fell in pieces.
When his wife got home she asked what he was thinking buying a monkey. He explained, “This monkey knows Karate.”
To this his wife replied, “Yeah right. Karate my foot.”KICK… PUNCH… CHOP!
One beaver practicing with his bo staff looks at another beaver and asks, “What’s brown and sticky?”
The other beaver said, “I dunno. What?”He shows him his bo staff and says, “A stick.”
Why did the cat get kicked out of the Karate tournament?He was a Cheetah.
What type of Karate does a giant ape practice?Kong-Fu
An untrained chicken beat a black belt at Karate.His next opponent… a pink dress.
What’s the fastest way to become a master of Karate?Run face first into a spider’s web.
Why did they have to turn off the 70s music at the petting zoo?“Every bunny was Kung Fu fighting.”
There you have it for the animal Karate jokes. Now that you see how it’s done, you might even be able to come up with some on your own.
Of course, yours will just be white belt jokes in the beginning. But hey, everyone has to start somewhere. Keep at it and you will be a black belt pun-slinger in no time.
Knock Knock Karate Jokes
So what is it that makes a good “Knock Knock” Karate joke? There are several factors that have to be included before it is clever or funny.
One of the obvious things that has to be there is a reference to Karate or anything surrounding it. This can be done by adapting an already tried and true joke, or you can make one from scratch.
The next thing is the format. You can try to get creative with the “Knock Knock” joke format, but it usually goes badly. The best practice is to just leave the first half the same, so everyone knows the pattern. The fun is then breaking the pattern in the second half with word play and surprises.
Lastly is the pun, rhyme, or grammatical gymnastics required to ‘KO’ the ending and leave them in the floor laughing. Okay, you have to be a master for that type of ending, but you get the picture.
So, now you know what makes a good “Knock Knock” Karate joke. Let’s kick this off (pun intended) and jump spin right in…
Sensei who?I sen-sei lot of kicks coming your way unless you open this door.
Doris who?The Dojo Doris locked, that’s why I’m banging on it.
Ice cream soda
Ice cream soda who?I scream so da people know I do Karate.
Candice who?Can dis Karate instructor turn me into a Ninja?
Haven who?Haven you been to Karate already this week?
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Anita who?Anita break this board if I want a new belt.
Alex who?Alex-plain to the police why I Karate chopped your door if you don’t let me in.
Owls say who?Yes, yes they do. Now, get to Karate class.
Ya who?You really are excited about Karate aren’t you?
Kenya who?Kenya break the board already? We don’t have all day.
Master Boo(e) who?Does your Karate teacher really cry that much?
Did you see the pattern? Sure you did. The word play is sometimes grand and sometimes unexpected. It is all in the pattern.
It is easier to get people to follow with some of these extreme stretching exercises using the English language if you stick to the same pattern. The listener knows when it is time to respond and more importantly, when they are expected to solve the grammar puzzle.
You have seen the pattern and you have heard the puns, now it is time to try some for yourself. It is harder than it sounds, but you can come up with your own if you put your head to it (but no headbutts).
Super Hero And Super Villain Karate Jokes For Kids
You will be hard pressed to find a kid that doesn’t like at least one of the super heroes from comic books, shows, or movies. Their preferences may lead them more towards one than another, but there will nearly always be one they are partial to.
It is the fantasy of most every kid to have powers that set them apart from the crowd. They fantasize about flying, swinging, or smashing even when they are supposed to be doing something else.
Add these super humans to a love of Karate and you have the makings of an attention grabber for most any child. Keeping that attention is a another story, but super heroes make everything easier when dealing with kids.
So lets jump into action and get going with the funny…
What is Superman’s favorite Karate move?Flying Side Kick
What is the Hulk’s answer to every question in Karate class?HULK SMASH!
What happened on the movie set in the city when the Incredible Hulk performed his famous jumping double hammer fist (Hulk Smash)?It turned into a Blockbuster
The Joker asked Batman, “If you are so good at the martial arts, how do you say Karate in Japanese?”
“Karate is Japanese,” replied Batman.“Wrong!” shouted Joker. “I didn’t ask you to say ‘Karate is Japanese’. I asked you to say ‘Karate IN Japanese!'”
Which super hero makes every Karate move better?Chuck Norris
What’s the answer to every Karate question?Chuck Norris
Why is Santa Claus good at Karate?He has a black belt.
What happened when the Invisible Man learned Karate?It was Karate like nobody has ever seen.
Why does the flash practice Karate standing behind a donkey?Just for kicks
What did Spider-man say to Dr. Octopus?Touch me with those tentacles and your first Karate lesson is FREE.
What did the Karate master say to Captain America?I’m a Karate instructor. What’s your super-power?
It doesn’t take a super brain to figure out why kids like the combination of super heroes and Karate. The funny has to come in at the end though or you will have gotten them excited and left them hanging.
Just use some of these examples and try to come up with some for yourself and you will have a group of kids hanging on your every word. You will have to keep ’em coming though. Kids can be a fickle crowd.
There are a lot of super heroes and there can be jokes centered around nearly every one. If you are wanting to attract a child’s undivided attention, sometimes pulling out a super hero Karate joke can be just what Dr. Octopus ordered.
Karate Jokes About Food
Ah food. For some kids it is the joy in life. For other little munchkins, it is the bane of their existence. We have had both in our household.
What is universal though is a love to poke fun at this central theme in our everyday lives. Take something simple like “criss cross apple sauce”. Every kid finds it funny if you refuse to say apple and constantly insert other things instead.
Criss cross banana sauce. See? It is an unexpected change from the mundane and kids love it. You can even insert non-food items like… criss cross dirt sauce. They get a kick out of it (pun intended) every time.
So here are some more traditional style jokes that revolve around food and Karate. As long as both are in the joke in some way all is fair game. Again, some are adaptations and some are my own creations.
You can give it a try after you read some of these gems (in my personal opinion of course).
What do Minions scream instead of Hi-yah in Karate class?Baaaaanaaaaanaaaaaa!
What do you get if an Apple makes a mistake practicing his sword Kata in Karate class?Apple Sauce
What do you call a carrot’s son that takes karate?The Carroty Kid
What kind of vegetable would Bruce Lee be?Brock O Lee
What do you call a gorilla that Karate chops a bowl full of grapes?Grape Ape
What Karate move works best for slicing pizza?Knife Hand
What is a Little Ninja’s favorite food after a Karate class?Smack-aroni and Cheese
Why do Karate students like hot and spicy food?Because it’s got a kick to it
What was Bruce Lee’s favorite drink?Wa-taaaaaahh! (water)
What was Bruce Lee’s favorite fast food?A Wap-paaaaaahh! (Whopper)
Why was Cinderella’s Karate team so bad at competitions?Her coach was a pumpkin.
See? Just at one cup of food and a heaping spoonful of Karate and you have all the ingredients for a good Karate food joke. Give it a try for yourself and see what you can create.
It could turn out to be a big nothing burger, or it could end up being a giant bowl of awesomeness. You will never know until you get your hands in the mix and whip up something of your own.
Weather Karate Jokes
What does the weather have to do with Karate? About as much as it has to do with sharks. Not much. But there are some that can be classified in this category.
The names of different things in Karate can be repurposed to make some funny puns and observations. If you think on it a while, lightning could strike and they could come falling out of the sky like rain.
Maybe not, but here are a few that can get you started on your own weather related Karate jokes.
What Karate move can destroy whole towns in Kansas?Tornado Kick
Why do Karate students turn into weather men when they do jumping, spinning kicks?They bring the rain
Where can you find the highest Karate black belt ranks on earth?Deserts. Some reach as high as 150 degrees.
What do you call it after a big storm and a bunch of sheep tumble down the muddy hill while practicing their Karate?A Lamb-slide
What is the rain’s favorite Karate weapon?A Rain-bo
What time of year do most Karate students get injured?The Fall
What time of year is the best for learning jumping kicks?The Spring
Why is a Karate tournament the coolest place in town?It is full of fans.
There isn’t quite as many that I could come up with in this section. I had so much fun with some of the other sections that this one got a bit neglected. See if you can add to them and if you find some good ones, send them to me and I might add it to this list.
If you come up with any good jokes of any kind that relate to Karate, here is my contact page so you can send them. I will include the ones that give me at least a slight chuckle. (Don’t worry. I laugh a lot so it isn’t that high of a bar to reach.)
Karate Jokes For Your Kid’s Sensei (Instructor)
This section is all about ammo. These are literally meant to be hurled at every Karate instructor you can find. They are not aggressive or offensive. So, it is more like tossing Nerf balls at them than mud slinging.
There are a lot of different themes here, but they all share two things in common. They are about Karate, and they are in some way related to Karate masters or instructors.
Once you get a handle on how these go, you will be on the road to disparaging the name of the Karate instructors in your life (Not really. It’s more like poking fun at them).
Now, bow to your sensei! ~ Rex, Founder of Rex Kwon Do (Napoleon Dynamite, the movie) (Click here to get his awesome pants!)
What kind of a cold does a Karate master get?The Kung Flu
What did the Karate master say when he took back his nachos from a thief?That’s not- cho-cheese!
What kind of car do Karate masters drive?A Kiiiiii-yah!
What is it called when a Karate instructor kicks a thief out of his pro-shop for stealing?Shelf Defense
Karate instructors don’t love Karate as much as you think they do.They just really hate boards.
What do Karate masters do when they make a big mistake?They kick themselves
What did the Karate instructor say when Chuck Norris asked him if he had any training weapons?I got None Chuck
What color belt does a Karate instructor get after taking a master test?Black and Blue (to match the bruises)
What is a Karate master’s favorite drink?Kara-Tea
Did you hear about the Karate instructor that tried his hand at stand up comedy?It was a HIT!
If a Karate master offers to make you a fruity drink, why should you duck?Because its a fruit punch
Why can’t Karate masters join any of the branches of the military?They keep knocking themselves out when they salute.
How can a Karate master beat a chess master in only three moves?KICK… PUNCH… CHOP
Why did the police arrest the Karate instructor for breaking boards at the lumber yard?He didn’t pay. He was chop-lifting.
Why did the Karate master get a standing ovation at his last demonstration?He was Sensei-tional.
What did one Karate instructor say to the other Karate instructor?We are both Karate instructors.
When a Karate instructor injured himself at a demonstration, he called out, “Someone call me an ambulance!”Someone in the crowd said, “You’re an ambulance.”
A Karate master was going to chop a tree right in half in the forest when the tree shouted, “Stop! I’m a talking tree.”The master said, “Yep, and you dialogue.”
Why did the Karate instructor squat on the floor, hug his knees, and lean forward?Cause that’s how he rolls.
Why couldn’t the Karate master show up to court in his Karate-Gi?He dropped his lawsuit.
What would a mummy Karate instructor say at the end of class?Let’s wrap this up!
Why did the Karate master wear two Gi tops when he painted his dojo?The instructions on the can said use two coats.
Some of these are about instructors and some of them are at their expense. Most Karate masters and teachers will find them funny. It would take a really up tight instructor to not give a chuckle to at least some of these.
Try them on your Little Ninja’s Karate instructor. It may just brighten their day.
Other Funny Karate Jokes Kids May Like
Here we have a bunch of random ones that didn’t fit neatly into any of the other categories. I couldn’t just leave them out. They could possibly bring a smile or giggle to some Little Ninja. They had to be included.
These are about professions, kids, and Karate students. If you have a profession in mind, see if you can come up with one that adds Karate and you have struck gold, gold I tell you!
This is the last group. I know, its sad. But you can always go through the lists again and pick out your favorites. Memorize them and you can hurl them at the next unsuspecting Karate student or instructor you come across.
What did the carpenter do on his Karate test when it was time to break the board?He nailed it.
Why is it harder to break a board on a Monday than it is on a Saturday?It’s a weak-day.
Why did the police arrest the black belt?He was holding up a pair of pants.
What did the zero say to the eight?Nice black belt.
Why could the skeleton never go to Karate class?Because he had no body to take him.
What is a Karate student’s favorite part of a joke?The punch line
Why did the baker choose to do Korean Karate instead of Japanese Karate?He heard it was called TaeKwon-dough.
What is the title of a lawyer that also has a black belt in Karate?A self-defense attorney
What do you call something that is hard to understand in Karate?Kung Fusing
What do you call it when a Little Ninja gets hurt doing Karate?A Ninjary
What’s the best self-defense technique ever invented?“I’m sorry.”
What are kids thinking when their parents are giving them a long lecture ?I might look like I am listening, but I am doing Karate in my head.
What did the Karate student say that refused to go to school?Education is important, but Karate is more importanter.
See, I told you. These were too good to just leave out because they didn’t conform to the other categories. They were like little caterpillars in their cocoons just waiting… nope, can’t finish it. Too much cheese is bad for your health.
Again, if you guys have any to add to these lists, just let me know. Here is my contact page so you can send them over.